My Turn: Super Paper Maria
by The Great Mikey Weston
Summary: Ahem! Today, I'll tell you the story of the four heroes of prophecy. The first was a simple girl, the second a fair princess, the third a monster king, and the fourth a traitor. This is the tale of their trials. It is a tale of darkness, hate, and love... ON INDEFINITE HIATUS. TO BE REBOOTED.
1. Prologue Part 1: The Second of Its Kind

_**What? v3.0!**_

This story was first an entirely original story. Then it turned into a Super Paper Mario fanfic. And it still is the latter, but this version of this chapter will be much better than the last. I now present to you (please let it be the last time I have to do this!) My Turn: Super Paper Maria, v3.0.  
**Note: **the creation of this new plot has officially turned this story into a slight **darkfic.** The rating has been raised to T. Readers be warned.  
I own this story and this version of Maria, but I do not under any circumstances own the Mario franchise. Hopefully THIS time, it's better.

* * *

Who am I?

I am the lonely girl in the corner. I am the one shunted to the side.

I am the one who caused the life of someone I cared about to be extinguished.

Is it my fault? Yes. Did I kill this person? No.

Then why does my cousin shun me from adventuring?

He thinks we're bad luck charms, causing at least one person to die on every adventure we go on. It was just one time, anyway, and he doesn't have to keep rubbing it in. We hurt more than he does.

I think he cares too much, but I'm just being nice. Sending us away to separate boarding schools where we're depressed is not the way to prevent someone from getting hurt, or hurting others. …At least, not to me.

Apparently causing the death of a loved one is an excuse to bring misery upon me, especially, since it was mostly my fault. And it is.

But he didn't have to take away my hat…

_**My Turn: Super Paper Maria  
**_

* * *

"…And so that's how I got to this school today."

Maria Mason stopped talking and gazed intensely at her classmates. A few moments later, they all threw paper balls at her.

"Look," one shouted, "Stop telling us this story for your nonfiction writing project! We know you didn't go on an adventure!"

"You just want attention!" yelled another.

All of the kids started shouting at once, and Maria's ice-blue eyes hardened. "Just ask Mario. He'll confirm it's true."

"You've never even met Mario, you liar!" snarled someone from the back.

"Please, everyone, calm down." A smartly dressed female Toad, short brown locks perfectly aligned underneath a navy blue spotted cap, looked sternly at Maria. "Miss Mason, I've had just about enough of this. Look at yourself. You're not physically able to go on such a rigorous adventure like that, so do you think you should even try to convince us? And do you even really have siblings that we've never seen before? Shouldn't your parents have sent you to the same school?"

"My _cousin_ didn't send us to the same school to punish us!" insisted Maria angrily. "And it's not my fault that I'm freakishly thin! It's really true. I went on an adventure three years ago with my two sisters, and we brought down-"

"No, you did not. You are Maria Mason, a thirteen year old seventh grader at Amanita Academy just like any other, and you are in my class for English and Language Arts. But a hero? I think not," said the woman, shaking her head.

"But Ms. Riquette T.-" Maria began.

Riquette T. interrupted. "Enough! Today, Miss Mason, instead of going to the game room, after classes you will come and have detention with me. Have I made myself clear?"

"Yes, ma'am," muttered Maria, her expression unreadable and her fists clenched.

A bell suddenly rang, and the students got out of their seats and shot nasty, gloating looks at Maria as they walked out the door, and Maria, who was holding the door, wanted to slam it in their faces. She looked at Ms. Riquette sadly, and walked out the door, quietly shutting it behind her.

"Hey, Maria," a voice called softly. Maria turned around and smiled at the shockingly bright blue Bob-omb girl in front of her. "Hey, Alfie! What's up?"

"Not much. I took that killer history test today." Alfie blinked. "It wasn't as hard as I thought, but all those questions… I think I did a good job, though!" She beamed at Maria with her kind, light eyes, but quickly turned serious. "So… how did it go? Did they believe you? There's no way you can't believe a story like that, it works perfectly with your history!"

"No dice," grumbled Maria.

Alfie sighed exasperatedly. "When will these people learn? Anyone can be a hero. Mario and Luigi didn't just appear from the Overthere and declare themselves heroes; they had to work up to it."

Maria just bit her lip, fingering her braid nervously. Yes, anyone could be a hero, but as a matter of fact, she wasn't Maria Mason at all. She certainly wasn't just anyone; she was Maria Mario, the younger cousin to the two Mushroom Kingdom superstars…on her father's side, of course, because if not, her last name wouldn't be Mario. But who would believe that she was their cousin? After all, her icy eyes were much lighter and a tad more green-hued than that of the Mario brothers, and her hair was also lighter than theirs, with some natural blonde highlighting from sitting in the sun. Her gaunt, bony figure didn't help her, either, since Mario and Luigi weren't fat, but not thin, either, with strong muscles. Though Maria had good stamina and could run fairly well, she found it very difficult to build muscle, or even fat.

"Maria? Hey! Are you listening?" Maria jumped when she realized Alfie had been speaking. "Oh! Sorry, I was just… thinking."

"Well, I was saying we should get to recess," Alfie repeated with some amusement. "Come on, let's go." Maria nodded and began to follow Alfie out the doors, but had barely taken a step outside when they were shoved roughly back in.

"Oi!" A dark haired human girl with dull brown eyes appeared to have been the perpetrator. Maria recognized her at once as one of her friends, Sable. At the moment, Sable was glaring at the two of them, though worry was etched into her face. "Maria, listen. Did you try to tell them that story you told me and Tatum last night? Goombrielle is outside mocking you, and it sounds an awful lot like she's making fun of your adventure. She's got a big crowd, too, and they're all on her side."

Maria groaned and put a hand to her forehead. "Goombrielle? Are you serious? Dang it… why me…?"

"Why you?" A Paratroopa boy with gray, speckled wings and a dark gray shell flew up next to Alfie. Maria, of course, knew him as Caleb, Alfie's boyfriend. "Because I'm here! I'm the master of all bad luck!" He raised his arms in mock celebration as a way to lighten the mood, despite not being the joking, careless type.

Alfie just snickered. A taller-than-average, blue tinged Goomba boy wearing a black scarf laughed uproariously. Upon calming down, the Goomba boy known as Tallgoom (for obvious reasons) grinned toothily at Maria. "He's a liar. _I'm_ the master of all bad luck!" Yes, Caleb was not the jokester, for that was Tallgoom's job...whether it was a good time or not.

Maria smiled weakly, and looked around. "Sable, have you seen Tatum?"

Sable opened her mouth to respond, but was interrupted by said pale skinned, black haired, black shelled Koopa girl putting her claw on Maria's shoulder abruptly. "Here!" Maria jumped, startled, but ended up laughing along with everyone else. With new confidence, Maria grinned and walked out the door.

Almost instantly when they made it to the swings, an alarm rang. "Attention students!" a voice boomed. "This is your headmistress. I am reporting that Princess Peach Toadstool has been kidnapped, again, by an unknown force. Students, please be advised not to do anything rash, as thugs are about. Recess is canceled tomorrow."

Maria must have looked absolutely thunderstruck, because Alfie rolled her eyes. "What do you expect?" Tallgoom gave his booming laugh again and was about to make another joke when the speaker turned on again. It was silent for a moment, and then a frantic voice sounded.

"Attention! Evacuate the school immediately. Students, please do not panic. Teachers, staff, please lead the students out! There is an attack on the school! Do not panic!"

The school panicked. There was screaming, and a scramble to get out the fence. Maria stared at her friends. "Wait," she said, loud enough for them to hear over the din. "Wait wait wait. Is this some kind of sick joke?"

"Why?" Caleb's dark eyes were curious. Alfie nudged him. "There was a huge announcement! Mario and Luigi went on vacation two days ago!"

Tatum's eyes widened, and the scowl that had appeared on Sable's face at the announcement of Peach's capture deepened. Caleb paled and clapped a claw to his forehead. Tallgoom just groaned. "This _is _a sick joke!"

"Not the time to display your humor, Tallgoom," Sable grumbled. Alfie turned to Maria. "What do you think they'll do?"

Maria studied the faces of her friends. Yes, they could handle the probably tough journey, if her hunch was correct and the person who had kidnapped the princess was far from here. They were tough, reliable, and loyal. She closed her eyes and answered. "There's no alternative…There's just one way to rescue the princess left." Maria's eyes snapped open again. She slowly pulled a bronze whistle out from under her bright red T-shirt and blew into it.

For some reason, this whistle was abnormally loud and rang clearly over the noise of the frightened pupils. A green Yoshi suddenly Flutter Jumped over the fence and landed smack in front of Maria, fidgeting excitedly from his travel to answer his mistress' call. A bronze collar glinted from around his neck.

Maria looked at her friends. "Listen to me!" She growled. "My last name isn't Mason. It's Mario!"

Alfie's eyes widened. "You're related to the Mario brothers?"

"Duh! I'm their younger cousin! Look, I know it's hard to believe, but please, you have to trust me! Just get over here!" Maria quickly mounted the Yoshi and patted his head, glaring at her friends. Tatum and Sable exchanged a glance. Caleb looked at Alfie, who was staring in disbelief at Maria, and Tallgoom looked utterly bemused. Panic surged into Maria. Did they not believe her?

The crowd was thinning and time for them to go unnoticed was running out. There was suddenly a flash of dark magic, and seeing this, Maria called franticly out for her friends. "Come ON!" she spat desperately, gesturing for them to hang on to the Yoshi. At last, Tatum was the first to step forward and put her arms around its neck. Alfie dashed forward and sat side-saddle behind Maria, Caleb clung to the back of the Yoshi's neck while flying to create more room, and Sable gripped the Yoshi's saddle while hanging onto Tallgoom, as he had no arms and there was no more room to sit on the saddle. The Yoshi closed its eyes, and warped out of the dimension.

There was no trace of them left.

The school called roll on all of their classes with the attendance sheets they had used that morning. Ms. Riquette T. found that Maria was missing, as well as a few other teachers discovered that some of their students were missing as well. A search party could not be spared, as they had to send all the students home and hurry home themselves. Due to this, all of them—most regrettably, except for Maria, in Riquette T.'s case, since she'd never liked the young girl—assumed that they had been captured and were being held prisoner, not with high honors like Peach, but as regular prisoners.

But they were wrong. Maria's second adventure had begun…


	2. Prologue Part 2: Captured

I don't own the Mario franchise.

I own this story but not most of the actual storyline, and I own this version of Maria.

* * *

"Keep holding on to the Yoshi!"

"There's… something… interfering with this portal!"

"I'm losing my grip!"

"Wait! Hold on!"

"I'll help you—come here!"

"I-I can't! Help me!"

"S…Someone's falling over there!"

"DON'T LET GO! HANG ON!"

"Ack! …"

* * *

Maria raised her head slowly, not being able to comprehend anything for the time being. She became dimly aware of someone helping her up.

"Come on, Maria, stay with me…"

Maria's vision slowly came back into focus, and shaking herself for a moment, grasped reality at last. She stared into Tatum's concerned face. "Maria, are you okay? We took a spill back there…"

Looking around, Maria couldn't see anyone else in sight. "Where is everyone…?"

"We lost them. They've gone somewhere else…" Tatum sighed. "Your Yoshi's gone, too."

"His name is Lime…" Maria supported her own weight and tested out her limbs, stretching. Nothing was broken, and she seemed to be unharmed. "Tatum, are you hurt?"

"I stayed in my shell after a while." She pointed to the black diamond shell she was wearing. "Don't forget diamonds are an incredibly hard substance."

"In that case, I'm really lucky…" Maria glanced around. She didn't recognize any of the darkened landscape. "Where are we?"

"Where else? Dark Land." Tatum sighed again. Clearly, she was feeling a bit frazzled from the rough appearance. "Can't you see Bowser Castle over there?"

Maria strode up to Vista Hill and squinted. Sure enough, she could see Bowser Castle looming over a moat of lava and a stone bridge. "Uh oh... we should get going. Hey, wait—maybe Bowser kidnapped the princess!"

"You think maybe we could get her back?" Tatum's red eyes glinted.

Maria had to admit maybe she was being a bit overconfident, but she knew Luigi sometimes joked in his letters about how soft Bowser was getting, so he couldn't be too difficult to beat anymore. "Yeah, totally! We can take Bowser!"

"And his baddies?"

"Have you SEEN their workout routine?"

"…Good point. Come on then, let's hit it." Tatum started to cross the bridge, Maria following. They quickly became aware of the entire army entering the hall right in the middle of the castle. Maria frowned. "Maybe we can sneak behind them."

Tatum nodded and dragged Maria behind her so she wouldn't be noticed among all the Koopas and Goombas. Slipping in the gate, they kept close to the crowd, remaining in the back so they could ambush by surprise.

There was instant silence as the door to the castle shut behind them. Feeling relieved at the change of climate from humid heat to air-conditioned room temperature, Maria silently exhaled. She and Tatum froze as Bowser's signature laugh sounded.

"BWA HA HA HA! Listen well, my elite minion task force!"

The pair looked up at Bowser, standing grandly at the end of the hall. "It's time to initiate my awesome plot to invade Mushroom Castle! Today is the day that I make my beloved Princess Peach ALL MINE! And if that weren't awesome enough…" He wagged a finger, grinning broadly. "Mario and Luigi are on vacation, and with any luck, they won't know until the Princess and I are happily married! What do you say to that, minions? Are you_ READY_?"

A great roar went up amongst the battalion. "Quick," Maria hissed softly. "While they're distracted, let's go!"

Tatum nodded, and the two began to whack the enemies out of the way. The war cries were suddenly punctuated with outbursts of "We're under attack!"

"Bwa ha ha ha! 'We're under attack'! You jokers are the best!" Bowser laughed. Then he blinked and squinted as Tatum and Maria looked up. They froze as he glared. "HEY! Who are those two girls in the back? I thought the cheerleaders didn't get here until tomorrow!"

Without any warning, the army scattered as Bowser took a great leap toward them, landing with a CRASH. "Grah! …who are you?" He stared, blinking.

Maria smacked her forehead. "I'm, uh…Maria Mason!"

"Tatum Koopsey," Tatum offered.

Bowser grimaced. "Tatum Koopsey like that singer on the Koopney Channel?"

Tatum's jaw fell open in shock. Maria steamed. "_What?_ There's a Tatum Koopsey on that stupid network? That's the last straw! I'm calling those screenwriters for identity theft!"

"…Right…Anyway, you, listen up!" Bowser pointed at Maria. "You look kind of like some weird female Mario, and it makes me MAD—" He stopped and stared. Two and two seemed to click in his head. "You look so much like Mario that… are you his sister or something?"

"THANK YOU!" Maria spat. "I'm his cousin, why can't anyone else tell—that's not why I'm here, though…" She sighed, restraining herself from ranting any further.

"Speaking of that, how'd you even get in here?" Bowser growled, getting angry again.

"Your front gate was open," Tatum said plainly.

Bowser gaped at them for a moment, and promptly started throwing a tantrum. "HOW MANY TIMES HAVE I TOLD THOSE IDIOTS? IF YOU'RE THE LAST IN, _LOCK THE GATE!_"

"Shut up!" Maria snarled. "We know you kidnapped the princess! Where'd you put her? We'll fight you for her!"

Bowser stopped and looked confused. "…Where'd I… but I was only about to launch my attack, I don't even have her yet—"

"MARIA, _HELP ME!_"

It grew deathly silent. Maria paled as everyone looked around for the source of Princess Peach's distressed voice, even the minor baddies, who looked clueless as ever.

Abruptly, Princess Peach appeared in the air, contained in a block of magical force. Tatum gasped. "_Princess Peach?_"

Another box appeared beside Peach's capsule…and the man who appeared in the air defied all description. "BLEH!" he roared, making the entire occupancy of the castle jump.

"Your princess has been taken…_by Count Bleck!_" he cackled.

"…WHO?" Bowser thundered, his claws shaking and his eyes wide as though he couldn't believe what he was seeing.

The man bowed. Maria took notice of his dramatically colored cape and white top hat, not to mention the classy monocle. It was hard to miss the scepter, just as well. "By me…Count Bleck!" the man repeated. "The chosen executor of the Dark Prognosticus…_is Count Bleck!_" He turned his gaze from the Koopa King to Maria and Tatum, who, like Bowser, stared up in disbelief. "The fine fellow prophesied to come to this dimension…_is also Count Bleck!_"

"I'll tell you who doesn't make even a little bit of sense…COUNT BLECK!" Bowser snapped, regaining his senses. Maria looked at Tatum to wonder aloud what was going on, but Tatum had a faraway expression. "Dark Prognosticus…" she said slowly, "Hang on…I've heard that before…"

"NEVER!" Maria and Tatum jumped and turned back to Count Bleck, who had denied Bowser of Peach. "The princess is a key point to fulfilling the prophecies of the Dark Prognosticus…she will be brought to Castle Bleck and used to destroy all worlds…_by Count Bleck!_"

Maria regained herself at this point for the first time since Count Bleck had appeared. "Destroy…ALL WORLDS?" She gasped. "You couldn't! You can't possibly! I won't LET YOU!" She leapt at Count Bleck, but was thrown back by a force field he created almost lazily. Maria was thrown back onto the ground, dazed, though she could still hear what was going on and see blurry images.

"Maria!" Tatum gasped, crouching. "Are you okay?"

"Such a scrawny, undernourished girl…" Count Bleck sighed. "Thinking to defeat Count Bleck…how bold! How courageous! How delightfully idiotic, for Count Bleck cannot be defeated!"

Bowser whistled to beckon the entire army forward. "Hey, here's a thought: how's about you let the princess go, OR ELSE!"

Though Count Bleck had at least a hundred pairs of eyes staring at him, he sighed again, shrugging. "How many times must Count Bleck be forced to tell you? The princess is essential to the prophecies. As a matter of fact…" He put a hand to his chin thoughtfully. "Bowser, evil King of the Koopas…you are truly an evil monster, aren't you?"

"Wh—hey, yeah!" Bowser puffed up proudly. "I am an evil monster! It's what I do best!"

"Yes, yes, of course you are, and as a matter of fact…Count Bleck will take YOU, TOO!"

"_WH…WHAT?_" Bowser roared.

Count Bleck opened up his cape and created an enormous black hole that swallowed up the rest of the army. As the army screamed and scrambled to get out of the way, Bowser clung desperately to a nearby statue, grunting as he fought to hold on. Tatum was clinging onto the same statue, while Maria was somehow unaffected by the suction. Tatum cringed as more of the army went flying by her, followed by a furious glare at the Count. "Why are you doing this?" she said angrily. "Why are you taking everyone?"

The Count simply stared at her for a moment, but after a few moments, spoke slowly. "_A fair and lovely princess… A furious monster king… The union of these two will call forth the Chaos Heart, the consumer of worlds, its power to be channeled within a child born of darkness and shadows. And the Chaos Heart will ravage the sky, and so bring forth the Void._" The Count continued to stare, apparently transfixed, until he spoke yet again. "'_Child of darkness'…_why…does that description not seem to fit you, young miss?"

"W-What?" Tatum gasped. "No! I'm not born of darkness! I'm—"

"A Dark Koopa, yes. But you have caught my monocle with an interesting attribute of yours…meaning Count Bleck requires you in the prophecies!"

With a particularly vigorous gust of wind, Tatum and Bowser fell away from the statue entirely, yelling loudly, Tatum's voice ringing over Bowser's low yelp with her terrified screech. Maria felt herself fading as the noise died away, and sunk into the comforting, unfeeling darkness. All she heard before she faded away was the maniacal laughter sounding once more…

"BLEH HEH HEH HEH! BLECK!"

* * *

"…aria…Maria…"

Maria was vaguely aware of someone calling her name. Feeling dazed for the second time in a few hours, she pushed herself up off of the ground, shaking her head to clear it once more. She looked around—she was still in Bowser Castle, but it was deserted except for some sort of rainbow butterfly. Maria assumed it was female, because it spoke with a clearly feminine voice as it addressed her. "Are you awake?"

Maria nodded, brushing herself off yet again. "I'm fine…who are you? How long have I been out?" she asked, feeling it would be rude to ask what rather than who.

The butterfly creature seemed to sense curiosity in both questions, however, as she answered both. "My name is Tippi. I'm what's known as a Pixl, a sort of fairy…you've been out cold for several hours, at least…I came to find you…"

Maria started and glared. "Wait. Is this a trick? This is a trick, isn't it?"

Tippi seemed remotely unfazed. "I am no enemy…" Again displaying her knack for sensing Maria's emotions, she continued, "You met Count Bleck…and he captured a princess and an evil monster king…is this not so?"

Maria was quiet for a moment. This had happened, but she pulled back from her fighting stance with a slightly suspicious expression, not knowing what this had to do with anything. "Yeah, that's what happened…"

"Then Count Bleck is even now beginning to form the Void…" Tippi's quiet voice took on a grave tone. "We haven't much time. Please come with me…"

It wasn't a request despite the 'please'; it was a command, with a hint of begging. Maria looked at Tippi, still not entirely trusting, and nodded slowly. She jumped as she was encased in a box, looking around bemusedly.

"Let us go…" Tippi said softly.

Then, the box flickered, and Maria knew only darkness.


	3. Prologue Part 3: A Guilty Conscience

I hope I'm doing better with SPMv3 so far. The slight differences that you see in conversations are either because they bothered me, they no longer fit with the plot, or they're leading up to something much bigger.

I don't own the Mario franchise. I own this story (though not most of the storyline) and this version of Maria.

* * *

The darkness didn't last very long, for when Maria blinked, she caught sight of bright scenery on top of a tall tower. Several regal-looking bronze pillars had been erected for no immediately apparent purpose, and looking to the sky, Maria saw a strange black hole similar to the one Count Bleck had created back at the castle. She paid it no mind at the moment, though, as she turned to face the only other person on the tower besides herself and Tippi—an old man with a gloriously long beard. He strode forward, beaming. "Oh ho! Back so soon, Tippi? Red shirt. Blue shorts. And might I add you're a bit peaky...maybe we'll have time to stop by Saffron's? Ah, no, no time to spare..."

"Wh...oh, you're talking about..." Maria heard her words droop sourly as she realized he meant her overly thin physique.

Merlon took no notice of this, looking out into the distance. He merely chuckled. "But that's besides the point, isn't it? Moving on, though: Tippi, you've truly outdone yourself yet again."

"She does match the description of the heroine in the Light Prognosticus…" Tippi said softly in the same flat tone that she'd been using the whole time Maria had spoken to her. "And her name is Maria…"

The man bowed. "Welcome to Flipside, Maria! This is a town far from the Mushroom Kingdom dimension you call home, but our dear Flipside is not one dimension, nor the other! It is between dimensions!"

Maria pondered this for a moment. "So it's like…2 ½-D…?"

There was a pause in which the old man laughed uproariously. "We have a comedian in our midst!"

Though Maria herself hadn't been trying to be funny and surely could've come up with a better joke had she actually been trying, she waited patiently for him to be finished laughing. When he had calmed down, he still wore a bright expression. "I am known as Merlon! I am a descendant of the Ancients who created this town! I busy myself studying musty, ancient texts to forestall the End of All Worlds!" This part sounded highly rehearsed, as though he'd said it many, many times before, but all of the conversation afterward was perfectly normal. "I must say I did think I would not live to see the day the Void would sprout in the sky, nor my heir, but would you look at that…" He tutted, making his beard flutter slightly.

Maria frowned, resting her elbow in her hand and her chin on her other hand. "So what exactly is the End of All Worlds?"

"You don't know? Well then, Maria…the answer lies above." He lifted his head to look at the sky. Maria's gaze slowly traveled to the dark blot staining the otherwise beautiful sky. She winced. "And what is that?"

"The Void, my dear. A hole in the very fabrics of space! It's such a strange phenomenon that it would a fascinating research topic were it not part of a plan for the apocalypse…" Merlon sighed. "Anyhow, it will only grow from this point, and in the end, it will swallow all existence, all dimensions…and it was created by Count Bleck, who wields the Dark Prognosticus."

"_A fair and lovely princess… A furious monster king… The union of these two will call forth the Chaos Heart, the consumer of worlds, its power to be channeled within a child born of darkness and shadows. And the Chaos Heart will ravage the sky, and so bring forth the Void…_" Tippi quoted quietly.

Maria flinched. This was the prophecy that had given the Count the excuse to snatch Tatum to an unknown place to…what was it? Channel the power of the Chaos Heart…she barely even knew what the Chaos Heart was other than a vague idea of it…

"That passage resides in both the Light and Dark Prognosticus," Merlon said solemnly. "It also says this: 'The Void will swallow all…naught can stop it unless the one who controls the dark power is destroyed. The heroine with the power of eight Pure Hearts shall rise to the task.' …So it is written…"

_So it shall be done,_ Maria silently finished, thinking of Tatum. _How could I have let that happen…?_

She barely took notice of Merlon holding up a glowing heart that portrayed a spectrum of color tinted red. "You are surely the heroine spoken of in the pages of the Light Prognosticus. You are the only one who can defeat Count Bleck and save all worlds!" He fixed Maria with a stare so intense that it actually snapped Maria out of her gloomy trance. "Maria! Take this and save all worlds from destruction!"

Maria was silent for at least a minute. She could've sworn she saw a bead of sweat go down Merlon's face. "…Alright then," she said finally, looking down at her high tops.

Merlon seemed to not see her subdued aura. "Excellent! You truly are the heroine of legend! My eyes never deceive!"

Maria nodded, still staring fixedly until Merlon shouted, "Maria! Take…THIS!" Her head snapped up just in time to see the heart being lobbed toward her, which she caught just in time. For all the warning he'd given her, he may as well have screamed "THINK FAST!" As soon as the heart touched her fingers, though, she felt warmth spread through her, and felt something like courage and hope rise in her body. It was red, like her…maybe that was why she felt such a strong bond toward it.

**MARIA GOT A PURE HEART!**

"Now, Maria, pure heroine of light…your first task awaits. You must take this Pure Heart to the Heart Pillar in town. Tippi will lead you there. Return to me when you've completed this task!"

Maria nodded again, gathering her strength, and followed Tippi in silence. They continued down an elevator and up another elevator, then along a passage to a tall white pillar with, like the Heart, a faint red tinge nearing the bottom. Maria leapt back as she felt a pulsating power emanate from it. Pulling out the Pure Heart, she placed it carefully in the pillar, at which point it glowed brightly. She felt a strange rush of air whoosh over her gently, until there was only silence and a faint reddish aura surrounding the pillar.

"Well done…let's return to Merlon…" Tippi fluttered back to the elevator, which Maria strode toward and pressed the button of to travel back to the first floor. Maria was led back to the tower and up the tower once more to receive a shock.

There was a red door in between the first set of bronze pillars. Merlon stood beside the door, beaming so broadly that it seemed to drown out the glory of the red door itself. "Look!" he cried upon Maria and Tippi reaching him. "A door has appeared! Unless I'm very much mistaken, this is one of the "dimensional doors" created to lead the heroine to another Pure Heart. Therefore, another Pure Heart lies beyond here."

Maria was suddenly and forcibly reminded of Mario's recent adventure that Luigi had sent a long letter about... after the letter about his adventure in the Waffle Kingdom, of course. '_Each Crystal Star will lead to the next…_' Surely this was the same concept, except there was no Thousand-Year Door to go to.

The wizard turned to Tippi, who remained emotionless. "Tippi, I'd like for you to accompany Maria so she can find the Pure Heart and return here."

"As you wish…" Tippi said simply.

Merlon stepped forward. "Maria, I have something that may aid you on your journey." He handed her a rucksack. "Inside of that rucksack are a few things I'm sure will help you. Healing items, a few more important things… And, one last thing." Merlon reached into his robes and fumbled for a moment. "One of the Ancients—also one of my ancestors—appeared to me yesterday, when the Void appeared in the sky. She told me to give you this." Merlon drew his hand out of the robes with a red cap. Maria's eyes widened as she took it from him, examining it. When she looked at the front, her thoughts were confirmed. There was a gold M carefully stitched into the front, minus the white circle surrounding it as it was on the original Mario cap. Mario may have confiscated it from her so she could no longer be recognized as his cousin, but there was no doubt about it—this was her hat!

Maria swallowed, feeling her eyes burn, and nodded as she blinked back tears. "Thank you, Merlon. Don't worry; we'll be back before you know it." She quickly put her hat on. With it, she felt more like her old self again.

"Merlon…!" Tippi said abruptly. "There's someone coming up the elevator."

"Ah, that's probably just…" Merlon marched off in the direction of the oncoming elevator. The elevator doors opened, and someone stepped out. Maria received a shock as she looked at…what was it, anyway?

It was a rather cute-faced white creature with black bat wings that reminded Maria of a normal human, except this creature had no visible ears or nose. It had brown eyes and wore red robes similar to Merlon's, though these robes seemed to be spangled because she—Maria was sure it was female—seemed to be almost glowing. Small black horns poked out of the long, dark hair that had been tied into a ponytail with a red ribbon, and its hands had black claws. Looking more closely, she could see a pointed tail like that of a demon trailing from the hem of the creature's robes.

The creature spoke to Merlon for a short time as Maria waited. "Who's that?" Maria asked Tippi softly.

"That's Merlon's new heir…I don't remember her name, but she's his apprentice…" Tippi replied.

"I thought you were his apprentice."

"I'm just his assistant," Tippi said quietly. "I can't make prophecies like those two can."

Maria frowned. "But what is she?"

"When she came to Flipside, her molecular stability was horribly disfigured for some reason…we think it was a mistake in dimensional hopping, but we couldn't keep her real form. She's just a demoness now…"

The demoness looked up at Tippi, then almost immediately looked at Maria. Her jaw dropped open so Maria could see small fangs. "_Maria?_" she asked, amazed.

Maria knew that voice. She racked her brains, then remembered with a jolt one of the friends who had fallen victim to the faulty dimensional hop. "_Sable?_"

* * *

Obviously, Tippi couldn't be the only one who had to have her form changed when she arrived in Flipside. If dimensional hopping is tampered with, you could have horrible mistakes occur. Hope you see my logic. So yes, Tatum was the first person Maria saw, but Tatum was taken, so now she's found a disfigured Sable. Part 0-4 will be some short explanations, and then 1-1 will commence.


	4. Prologue Part 4: The New Prophecy

I've had the time to write this chapter (and happy almost Halloween, everybody) so let's continue. (**Don't kill me if this chapter seems a little filler-ish and is a bit short.**)

I don't own the Mario franchise; I own this story and this version of Maria. I also own Maria's friends.

* * *

"What are you doing here?" Maria asked, stepping forward to take her friend's hands—claws, now—in her own.

"I got hit with something weird," Sable replied coolly. Maria knew from experience that she was trying to make it seem as though it wasn't a big deal. "I woke up here and I was in a lot of pain. Suddenly the pain stopped, and when I looked at myself in a mirror after Merlon and Tippi found me…" She shrugged. "I looked like this."

Merlon looked from Sable to Maria with amazement. "You two know each other? Oh ho! This is a remarkable turn of events!"

Tippi fluttered forward. "Sable… can we get to business?"

"No, not yet, Tippi, I have a lot of explaining to do." It had been Sable's question, but it was Merlon who held up his hands. "You see, Maria, when Sable arrived here, I had to use my magic to give her a form she could keep her soul properly contained in, and this was the only thing I could think of that was stable enough for such an unstable soul."

"I thought it was molecular instability," Tippi said with some confusion.

Merlon shook his head. "That's what I thought at first, but it turned out to be more than that. Sable's body was in so distorted from the teleportation error that I had to give her a new form entirely, not just change a few things around."

Maria gasped. "That's terrible…Sable, are you alright?"

Sable shrugged again. "Being a demoness isn't that bad. I can breathe fireballs, I'm stronger, and I'm immune to devil's deals. I can break magical covenants that normal people would die from breaking," she added at Maria's bemused expression.

"As you can see," Merlon continued, "being a demoness to save your soul is hardly a bad deal."

Tippi fluttered impatiently. "That's great and all, but why did you come up here, Sable?"

Sable glanced at the rainbow Pixl. "I went into a trance and found out about five minutes later that I'd made a prophecy, because I remembered it. Here…" She cleared her throat. "_Vitality to the mission speaks clearly through the eyes. Only the heroine with the power of the Pure Hearts can distinguish worthy from unworthy. A soul of ever blue… a flightless wing… a name of courage… though destined to fight, it is the heroine's choice alone for them to follow._"

Maria looked blank. Even Tippi had a blank air around her despite not having a face. Merlon, however, offered an idea. "It could simply mean that Maria is destined to have partners, but she's the only one who knows if they'd be loyal to the end."

Sable nodded as comprehension dawned on Maria and Tippi. "That's what I'm sure it means."

"Wait, but I've never been important like this…" Maria winced. "Are you sure I'm good enough to be a heroine?"

"Of course," Sable said at once. "Aside from the prophecy saying you're the only one for the job, I've known you three years and you're no wuss—and you're not evil, either."

There was a pause in which Merlon and Sable waited patiently, Tippi was silent, and Maria fidgeted with her gloves. At last, she spoke. "…But what if—"

"Oh, get a move on already, Maria," Sable interrupted. "If you're not confident enough, the most that'll happen is the apocalypse, that's all."

Maria seemed to start at her sarcasm. "You're right. I have to go. Thanks, Sable, and Merlon!"

"The start of your journey has been delayed far too long, though I do believe hearing this new prophecy was worth your while. Farewell, Maria, and good luck to you!" Merlon waved as Maria opened the red door and disappeared inside, Tippi following close behind her.

Sable sighed. "We're counting on you, Maria… I just wish I could do more…"

* * *

She couldn't see anything.

She tried to scream, but her mouth would not move. Her body was completely incapable of moving. She was frozen in a sitting position, leaning against something.

"Open your eyes."

Her eyes flew open.

The entire room was black in color, but she could still see light, somehow. In front of her was the man behind everything—Count Bleck. The Count stared her down like before. "Tell me your name."

She felt her own mouth move, incapable of disobeying commands, but no voice came out. Her throat was dry and hoarse, and she could not speak. Count Bleck seemed to realize this, for he put a flask in her hands. "Drink, Count Bleck commanded."

Again, with robot-like obedience, she lifted the flask to her lips and drank the entire bottle gratefully upon realizing it was fresh water. Every last drop went into her parched body. Count Bleck took the flask back and stared her down once more. "Now tell Count Bleck your name."

She felt her mouth move again, and this time, her voice and mouth formed her name.

"Tatum Koopsey."

The Count drew out his cape, and Tatum flinched involuntarily for fear of him creating another portal like at the castle, but he was merely reaching out in front of him. Tatum recognized the Dark Prognosticus with faint horror.

This didn't go unnoticed by the Count. He cackled softly. "You remember the book? You should remember, child, or have you lost your mind completely?"

Tatum opened her mouth and found she could speak of free will. "I remember, but I don't know why I remember."

Laughing, the Count thumbed through the dark book until he came to a page not far from the very beginning of the book. "_A child of darkness will come, and the child shall be the centerpiece of many prophecies yet to be, and the connection between shadow and light._ Undoubtedly, you are this child."

Tatum, though she could speak, felt a pang as she realized she could not stand or move otherwise. "But that's…that's not…"

"That's not what? Not right? Of course it's not. Not true? Of course it is. Not fair? Life isn't fair, Tatum, and you would do well to remember it." Tatum shrank with regret as the Count pointed his sharp scepter at her throat. "Remember it well, and you will forget all you have caused."

"All I have caused?"

"You caused the Void to be opened." The Count cackled. "It is no one's fault but your own."

Tatum jumped as she remembered what had happened. She _had _opened the Void…

The Count watched her changing expression with a grim smile. "And you say you're still innocent after all this? Even in past prophecies you've caused much pain and suffered prosecution in the case of a failed dark prophecy…" He continued reading prophecies aloud. "_The child of darkness will bring down a city of glory… A child of darkness will bring suffering unto all… Along with the child of darkness, shadows will rain from the heavens and destroy life…_"

"Stop it!" Tatum burst out. "I didn't do any of that! If you're that early in the book, those have to be from… from…"

"Thousands of years ago! Precisely the point, Count Bleck exclaimed. You have not always been Tatum Koopsey. You have taken many forms and repeatedly denied this until your true self comes out. And in this prophecy, you are meant to destroy all worlds by channeling the Chaos Heart! We have helped you along, but you alone opened the Void, as Count Bleck has already explained."

_Flashback_

"_I-I…do…" Peach gasped, lying on the ground, suffering from hypnosis._

_Tatum was bound in chains right in between, just behind the altar. As she heard the princess succumb, she gave a cry of horror, eyes wide. The Count drew out his cape. "Chaos Heart, come forth!"_

_Without any warning, Tatum felt herself being lifted from the ground. Something awoke inside of her, and she dug her claws into her hands so hard that she drew blood…but that was nothing compared to the unspeakable pain this was causing her. A gray heart that glowed darkly formed in front of her. She felt its pulsing match her own heartbeat…_

_And quite suddenly, it went inside of her. The other self inside her woke completely, and she suddenly had no control over her own actions even though she could see what was going on. Darkness swept over the sky, and a spiraling hole twisted its way out of the nonexistence like a snake made of smoke—all by her claws. Lightning flashed from inside of it, and she was aware of the pain leaving her, and of Count Bleck laughing, and of seeing a very much alive Chaos Heart float into the sky…_

_And she fell back into darkness…_

_End flashback_

"I didn't want to do that," Tatum said harshly. "The Chaos Heart possessed me."

"You have had the soul of a demon all your life, Tatum, and your lives before that." The Count's monocle glinted eerily. "In time, you will understand…"

And with that, the Count snapped his fingers, and Tatum sank into unconsciousness once more.

* * *

Incidentally, **if you're a fast reader or if you like music to go with your reading,** I would suggest listening to "The Evil Count Bleck" from the Super Paper Mario soundtrack while reading from the point where Count Bleck reaches for the Dark Prognosticus all the way to the end. It has a very good effect.

_Until next time, see you guys around~! -Mikey_


	5. One Part 1: Elemental

**CONCERNING CASTLE BLECK MEETINGS: **Caleb (the Paratroopa from chapter 0-1) is going to listen in on Bleck and co. so he knows what's going on. The logic surrounding why he's not captured is that a) the meeting room is HUGE and b) if they couldn't track the rest of Bowser's minions instantly with whatever powers they have at their disposal, how would they track Caleb? Later, he'll meet up with Maria, but that's not going to be for a while.

**CONCERNING FLIPPING INTO 3-D: **Assuming they're normally proportioned and not paper, I don't think 3-D would make a difference, so Bestovius is going to teach Maria something else.

I do NOT own Super Paper Mario. I own this version of Maria and Maria's friends.

* * *

"BLEH HEH HEH HEH! BLECK!"

Caleb slapped his claws on either side of his head. The maniacal laughter ringing through the halls of the black castle was killing him—whoops, there went his migraine. Grimacing, the Paratroopa looked over at Tallgoom. The Goomba in question had promised to keep watch for any enemies and keep them away with his hardened Headbonking skills, though Caleb was still skeptical about it. At present, the rather (as his name stated) tall Goomba was sleeping, which was precisely what made Caleb so unsure about Tallgoom's 'l33t skillz', though he had to grudgingly admit he did have a pretty hard head.

Caleb glanced back at Tallgoom, whose now-tattered black scarf was fluttering gently due to his soft exhaling. Caleb quietly snuck off at the sound of more voices. He managed to find his way to a large hall, entering through a narrow crack in the wall. Caleb looked up and saw, with faint horror, a tall, white caped man that he recognized as Count Bleck. The only reason why he was able to recognize him was because he'd met some of Bowser's minions, who did not attack him and Tallgoom, but told them of the Count and his minions. With a silent cry of dismay, he saw Tatum trapped in a cage that was dangling from the ceiling. She was pale and limp, but clearly alive. Caleb's speckled gray wings twitched as he blushed, thinking of the pretty ruby-eyed Koopa with a faint pulse race. Reminding himself it was not _Tatum_ he liked, but _Alfie_, the girl he was _dating,_ that mattered, he stayed utterly still and watched the scene continue.

"…we must follow the instruction of the Dark Prognosticus," the Count finished, clearly at the end of his sentence. "And so we have our friend Tatum here."

For some reason, Bowser was standing on one platform. He looked up at the cage with faint scorn. "Is that a Dark Koopa? What's so special about her?" Caleb realized it was not Bowser, but a girl masquerading as him, for the voice that had just sounded was clearly feminine instead of Bowser's notorious growl. At his—er, her words—he'd felt a faint growl rise in his throat, but had forced it back down hurriedly. The Count was already wagging his scepter. "Count Bleck was just saying how he's following the instruction of the Dark Prognosticus by keeping her alive."

"Oh." The girl blinked, making Bowser's form blink.

"By the way, Count…" Caleb's gaze turned to a woman—shorter than, but similarly colored to the Count himself—who spoke next. The bun in her pink hair quivered whenever she spoke. "There's been some unapproved interdimensional activity recently. I'm sure it's the heroine of prophecy, so we'll need to take action concerning her…"

Caleb had no clue what this was supposed to mean, but it seemed to unnerve the Count. "_What?_ The heroine of prophecy? Nastasia, have you double and triple checked on this?"

Nastasia shrugged. "It's a guess, but an educated one."

Count Bleck sighed deeply. "We must put an end to this nuisance at once, decided Count Bleck firmly."

"COUNT BLECK! Lemme take 'er! Yeh gotta let me on me honor as a warrior!" Caleb jumped as the booming voice sounded. Thankfully, the large, bearded man's voice was so thunderous that the small noise he'd made was virtually nonexistent. Silently exhaling in relief, he kept listening.

The girl disguised as Bowser looked angry, which was effective with the Koopa King's facial features. "O'Chunks! You want to take on a girl?"

"Sometimes these things 'afta be done!" O'Chunks shot back. The girl opened her mouth again, but Count Bleck raised his hands for silence. "Very well, O'Chunks, I will leave the chunking to you. Kindly do not fail Count Bleck."

Caleb began backing out of the room through the crack—Tallgoom would be worried if he were gone too long. But by the time he got back to the small room they'd made a hidden crate-fort in, Tallgoom was gone. Grieved and deeply worried, Caleb huddled in the darkest corner of the crates, wondering just who it was that was about to die by the hands of a large, brutish warrior.

* * *

It was a fair-weathered afternoon in Lineland…when abruptly, a red door appeared in the middle of nowhere and opened. A girl wearing a red cap stepped out, followed by a rainbow butterfly. Raising a hand to her forehead, the girl was just beginning to look around when a ringtone played.

"_What,_" Maria asked, annoyed, "was _that?_"

Tippi fluttered level with the rucksack strung across Maria's back. "It's coming from in here…"

Maria quickly opened the rucksack and rummaged through it until she found the source of the obnoxious ringing: a red Mailbox DSi. She opened it and spoke into it. "Hello?"

"_Maria, this is Sable…_"

"Hi, Sable! How did you know Merlon gave me a Mailbox DSi?" Tippi fluttered quietly as Maria continued the conversation.

"_He just told me. Anyway, Merlon wants you to look for a friend of his named Bestovius so you can learn an elemental technique. He says you should have ended up on Lineland Road and Bestovius lives nearby._"

Maria frowned in thought. "…it is necessary, right? I can't stop for just anything."

"_Yes, Maria. This technique is necessary._"

"Right then, I'll stop. Thanks for telling me! Bye." Maria stowed the Mailbox DSi into her rucksack again, this time pulling out an odd drink with a Mushroom on it. "…What's this?"

"A Shroom Shake…it's a Mushroom compacted into a shake…it has more nutritional value than a plain Mushroom," Tippi replied.

Maria looked stunned at this knowledge, but put the Shroom Shake away and started off on her way.

"I can feel a Pure Heart," Tippi told Maria as they continued. "It's far away, but I can sense it…"

Maria winced at the thought of walking a long distance, but decided they could stop anywhere they found civilization. "Long enough to make us have to stop for a day?"

Tippi gave an odd nodding motion to Maria that seemed to be in the affirmative answer. "Yes, I think so…Lineland Village is closer than necessary, so if we stopped there, we'd waste time…it's best we stopped at Yold Town."

"Yold Town, got it." Maria barely had time to respond before seeing a pink pig creature. "Whoa! It's cute! What is it?"

Tippi fluttered forward to identify it. After a few seconds, she replied, "It's a Squiglet…"

The Squiglet had spotted Maria and charged toward her. Maria gasped and jumped, leaving the Squiglet crushed underfoot. She winced. "Aww…is that really how it has to end…?"

Maria faced much more heartbreak as she continued to stomp Squiglets, though she showed open disdain at and gladly stomped on the purple Squigs, who, rather than charged at her, shot rocks at her. At last they came to a house which, upon entering, was vacant to the naked eye.

Tippi, however, knew better. "This house is not empty…" She fluttered in front of Maria and landed on the wall. A door suddenly appeared as if paint had just melted off of it. "A door… let's go through it…" Nodding, Maria opened the door and slipped inside, Tippi trailing after her.

As soon as she entered, she heard an over-the-top "HMMMMMM?" Turning, Maria saw a man dressed in rich crimson, leaf green, and bright blue, his mustache as fluffy as the clouds he floated upon, peering at her with a sense of extreme superiority. "What is this meager lock of hair that appears before me? And how does it have the audacity to address my multicolored glory? …How did these flimsy strands detect my secret door…?"

Annoyance rose in Maria. "It's called a braid," she said coldly.

The floating gentleman appeared not to hear her. "Wait a moment. Red cap… blue shorts… white gloves… Hah! You are dressed in the garb of the heroine of prophecy! And that must mean… you are the great…"

Maria inclined her head with surprise at recognition.

"**HEROINE**

…imposter!"

Maria promptly buried her face in her hands and groaned.

"What a costume! You look like you leaped out of the pages of the Light Prognosticus!" the man said enthusiastically.

Maria's head shot back up out of her hands, and she rapidly shook her head. "No, no! My name is Maria, and I _am_ the heroine, so of course I'm dressed like this!"

Sensing trouble afoot, Tippi quickly flittered in front. "Merlon told us to find you…"

"_Merlon?_ His long, luxurious beard is the only rival to my hairy magnificence…well, if Merlon says you are the heroine of prophecy, then I suppose that means you are…at least, I think it does…but anyway, as the prophecy foretells, I, Bestovius, shall teach you an elemental technique necessary to defeating the darkness."

Maria opened her mouth to thank him, but was interrupted.

"For a nominal fee of 10,000 Coins!"

"_WHAT?_" Maria choked out.

"That's outrageous," Tippi protested. "You can't charge to teach the heroine of prophecy!"

"_Why not?_" Bestovius asked pompously. "Why should the heroine get the world served to her on a well garnished platter, and the ones who helped along the way nothing at all, hmm? Heroes nowadays seem to think they can all get away with being taught free skills! A mere 10,000 Coins is _nothing_ to you, O Heroine of the universe, yes?"

Maria winced. "Actually, um…I don't even get an allowance. I just save up the money I get at holidays and on my birthday."

"Mmm…so be it." Bestovius sighed deeply. "Then I will settle for all the coins in your pocket. How does that sound?"

Grimacing, Maria shook her head. "If I do that, I'll have no money at all to buy supplies for the adventure, and then the universe will be doomed."

Bestovius sighed yet again. "Oh, bother. Fine, I shall waive the nominal fee and teach you the technique for free."

"Thanks!" Maria laughed weakly, relieved.

Giving a sort of noncommittal 'it's nothing' shake of the head, Bestovius drifted forward and cleared his throat loudly. Chanting, he gestured grandly at Maria, who felt a warm sort of shiver pass through her body, and became aware of her hands glowing. She suddenly felt wide awake.

"I, Bestovius, have given you the Firebrand ability," Bestovius announced. "Simply use the power of continuity to find use for it!"

Maria gave him a confused look, which prompted the floating mage at once. "What? What is 'continuity', I suppose you are wondering? Well, I assure you…" Bestovius turned to look out of the computer or cell phone screen from which you, the reader, are reading, "that if we are being watched from another dimension, those beings will understand. But you lack the locks for such comprehension. Just remember you can use this ability to attack enemies and to break obstacles. Good luck on your adventure, young miss."

Bowing politely, Maria backed out of the room. "Thank you for the technique, sir…um, bye, I guess." She headed out the front door as soon as she could.

"Where to next?" she prompted Tippi. Tippi flew forward again and was still for a moment. "…We keep walking. We'll eventually reach Yold Town and be able to stop for the night…"

Nodding, Maria continued the long walk onward. This wasn't going to be easy, but Maria was ready for a second chance at adventure.

* * *

I'm not going to put Maria going through pipes and solving puzzles very often because it sucks away time that she could be having a conversation, or thinking, or doing something. Yold Town is more interesting.


	6. One Part 2: Red, Pixls, and Ye Olde Man

Isn't it sad that no one reads my story anymore? Oh well. Dun care. YOUR LOSS!

**CONCERNING THE STORYLINE: **A few modifications have been made, as you can see by the extra prophecy, Maria's friends, the Firebrand, etc. But the outcome of the story** will be exactly the same.**

**CONCERNING THE FLIP-THINGS THAT TAKE YOU ACROSS PLACES: **Those have been replaced with a balloon-plant of my own creation called Slipslides. You'll see them soon enough.

**CONCERNING PIXLS: **No Pixls will be joining Maria. Instead she'll get artifacts from the Pixls to allow her to use certain abilities.

I don't own Super Paper Mario; I do own Maria and her friends.

* * *

Maria had learned the Firebrand technique, but still had to find the Pure Heart. The road was going to be hard and long, the trail paved with danger at every turn, but Maria was not afraid. Nothing would stop her from collecting the Pure Heart on the other side of the tall mountain in front of her…

The air was dry here, Maria noted, as she walked further into a shadow of a great mountain. Dry, but comfortable. She was not hot, nor cold. There was a pleasant breeze, and the hot sun did not beat down on her from her position in the darkness. Walking this distance, she was sure, would be pleasant and easy.

Except…

"We have to go over these mountains," Tippi said.

Maria stared, dumbstruck, at Tippi. "_What?_ C-Can't we go around?" She knew before the answer was given that they could not.

"No," Tippi replied, somewhat ruefully. "The paths around the mountains are impassable… even if we were able to manage the terrain, the sun would fry us…"

Maria gritted her teeth, looking up at the looming figure ahead. "And it wouldn't up there?"

"It would take a shorter time to brave the mountains than the paths…" Tippi was already fluttering forward, so Maria supposed she had no choice. Sighing, she began to climb.

It was a long, hard ascent up the first mountain. At the top, she came across an oddly bulbous sphere with a reddish hue growing like a normal plant…but it didn't even look like a plant past its ordinary stem and leaves. She eyed it somewhat warily, but felt curious at the same time. "What's this?"

Tippi landed on Maria's hat. "It's a Slipslide… they were first native to Flipside, then started cropping up everywhere. It'll take you where its matching colored plant is…"

Maria squinted—sure enough, in the distance, she saw another Slipslide of the same color. Trusting in Tippi, Maria plucked the Slipslide from the ground.

Almost at once, she found herself floating as if she were holding a balloon. Not daring to let go or look down, Maria shut her eyes as she felt herself floating away from solid ground.

_There's ground beneath me,_ she told herself repeatedly, nauseous and dizzy. _There's definitely ground beneath me. It's okay if I let go, but it's best that I don't. There is absolutely a flat surface under me, just a few inches from the soles of my feet_.

All too soon, the Slipslide popped without warning, and Maria shrieked as she fell…three inches to the ground. Confused, she looked around and saw the other Slipslide to her right. Relieved, heart racing, Maria continued to hike along the mountain path.

Slipslides were definitely not Maria's favorite way to travel. Another pair with a dark blue color could be seen too quickly for Maria's liking, and though the tiny fall to the ground did not startle her as badly, she still felt an unpleasant lurch when the drop began. Shivering despite the heat, Maria followed an indifferent Tippi in the direction of the Pure Heart.

Though she did not like Slipslides, Maria found herself wishing for them when she was forced to climb horrendous heights to get up the mountain. Stopping after several hours to rest in the shade, Maria felt like she'd already had enough of the mountainous landscape.

"How much longer do we have to go, anyway?" Maria quizzed the Pixl, drinking water from the tiny mountain brook with undisguised greed.

She was answered only with a sort of butterfly shrug. "I'm not sure… but enjoy the water while you can, we have nothing but desert ahead of us after a stop at Yold Town…"

Eyes wide, Maria started to stock up on water, only to be stopped by Tippi landing on her hand. "No need…we'll get plenty of that in Yold Town."

"Oh. Good point." Maria stopped where she was in filling up her bottle of water, twisted the cap, and jumped up. "Come on, we have to keep going before night falls."

It was harder than before to climb, since she was already so tired, but it wasn't nearly as long a time before she found a gap with absolutely no way across. In the distance, a red house was visible—Maria was forced to squint in the setting sun. "Hey, Tippi," Maria panted, leaning over with her hands on her knees, "How do we get across this gap—" She suddenly noticed Tippi was no longer here, but a relatively short man around Mario's height was hurrying toward her. Only when he neared did she see he actually resembled Mario somewhat, except he was carrying a spear. Maria braced herself until he panted, "Hey! Are you Maria?"

Maria nodded slowly, eyeing the equally exhausted man. He clearly didn't get a lot of exercise. "Who are you?"

"I'm Red, the bridge keeper… your friend saved me from some weird other dimension. You needed something?"

Hardly daring to believe her luck, Maria glanced gratefully at Tippi, who had just returned to her side. "I need to get across this chasm here."

"Oh, no problem! But, ah… I have to ask you an important question, since I can only let select people cross. If you get it right, I'll lower the bridge for you." Red eyed Maria, the latter straightening up. "So, here…what's the most awesome color in the universe? Red, green, or both?"

It took about five seconds for Maria to realize what the right answer was. "It's red, without a doubt," she said quickly.

Red beamed. "Yes! Correct! See, I guess even girls can see eye to eye with me on fashion, right? I'll go lower the bridge for you. Take it easy, missy!" And with that, he dashed back to his house. Maria watched him leave, grinning broadly at Tippi. "Thanks!"

"No problem…" Tippi replied quietly, facing in the direction of the newly settled bridge. Maria dashed across, expecting more mountains, but was greeted with a pleasant surprise: she had arrived in Yold Town. Blue eyes sparkling, she strolled more slowly into the civilization, scanning the area brightly. "We're here!"

"Yes, we are." Tippi settled back on Maria's hat. "Maybe we should get to the inn, over there…"

Maria gasped as her rucksack vibrated once, reaching into it and checking the Mailbox DSi. This time it was a message rather than a call. Tippi peered down with it as Maria read:

_Maria-_

_I hope this reaches you before you settle down at an inn for the night. Go talk to the mayor of Yold Town, Mayor Watchitt, and ask him to lower the bridge for you. Sorry this is so late, I just got word that the bridges aren't up. Take care._

_-Sable_

"_Now _she tells us this?" Maria groaned, stashing the red device away again. "And I was all set to flop on a nice, soft bed and just sleep…"

"It's too late now, we have to go talk to the mayor…"

"Alright, alright—" Maria squealed as she tripped and fell into a deep hole that had been nearly invisible to them until the moment Maria had tripped. She fell on her back and groaned. "That hurt…" She felt her foot unlatch something, and a gust of wind brushed her side as something came out.

Tippi's voice rang softly from above. "Hello? Maria, are you alright?"

"Yeah, I guess so—wait! Don't come down here!"

"Oh, it's too late, I've already come down…"

"Who's that?"

"Who are _you?_"

"I'm Tippi…"

"What are you doing here?"

"Tippi, where are you?"

"Just how many people are down here?"

"Two!"

"Well, one, I'm not human…"

"Then we have a human, a Pixl, and…"

"How did you know I was a Pixl?"

"Not you, me."

"You? Then there's…"

"Hang on, there's a candle around here somewhere!"

A light suddenly flared, and Maria found herself and Tippi standing in front of a chest and a hand-shaped Pixl. Maria blinked, stunned. "Who are you?"

"I just asked the same question, thank you very much." The Pixl looked annoyed. "Wait… red shirt… blue shorts… red cap… you must be the heroine of prophecy! I must admit I expressed concern when the Ancients stuffed me into that chest some 1500 years ago, but my goodness, you've come in a much shorter time than I expected!"

Maria tilted her head. "Oh, then you must be… um… sorry, I have no idea who you are."

"You are a Pixl, though…?" Tippi queried him.

The hand-shaped Pixl drew himself up as though he were now at his full height. "Yes! My name is Thoreau! You don't look familiar, though, miss… are you a newer Pixl model?"

Maria expected Tippi to answer automatically, but was stunned when she actually fumbled for a response. "I, um… ah…"

He waited for a moment, then seemed to shake himself. "No matter, details do bore! What matters is that I have waited for centuries to give my amulet to the heroine, and now that I can, I will be able to live freely once more! HUZZAH!"

Thoreau, um, 'hand'-ed Maria a gold bracelet with several nooks to put charms on, then fastened a hand-shaped charm in his likeness onto it. It glowed, as did Maria. Maria gasped. "What just happened?"

"You just received the power to throw at great distances! Here, try it~!" Thoreau gave Maria a rock, but her arms could not wait—she immediately hurled it at a switch on the ceiling. A ladder sprouted from the ground to lead up to the surface. Thoreau beamed. "Farewell, heroine… and good luck with your journey!"

* * *

"WHOOZIT? I'm the elder around here, so WATCH IT! What do you want? Git off mah RUG!"

Maria and Tippi had stopped at the elder's house… and promptly found him to be rather cranky. Apparently the townsfolk called him 'Old Man Watchitt', which seemed to be a rather appropriate name, considering his catchphrase.

"Please, sir," Maria said carefully, grimacing slightly, "We were just hoping to pass through town."

"Aaaaah! Nothing but desert past here. There's treasure, sure, but who wants all that grit in their grunders anyhoo?" Old Man Watchitt gave Maria an unblinking stare—rather, glare. "That's what Yold Town here is for. Yold Town protects the treasure from people like _you. _WATCH IT!"

Maria and Tippi looked at each other with some dismay. "But, sir…"

"No, no buts. See this hat here? It has something to tell you." He leaned in closer to speak more softly, and Maria and Tippi leaned in as well. "It says… WATCH IT!" He thundered, causing Maria to jump back a few inches and hold her head, wincing. "Just give it up. Can't let you pass," Old Man Watchitt grunted.

"Sir, please… this is the heroine of prophecy we're talking about…" Tippi pleaded softly.

"WHUZZAT? WHIZZIT? You're the heroine?" Old Man Watchitt's mustache quivered excitedly. "_Dumplings! _If you were, you'd have a charm bracelet with a hand charm on it!"

Maria lit up at once. "I do have that! Here…" She lifted her wrist to the old man's eyes. He squinted and put on some large glasses—the gold bracelet and colorful hand charm were unmistakable, of course. "Aaaah! Of course you have it! You're the heroine! Knew it all along! I'll call Green, he'll let you across."

Old Man Watchitt whipped out a phone and dialed quite speedily for his eye quality. He promptly held the phone up to his ear after this. "Hello, Green? It's Watchitt. …I said Watchitt. WATCH IT! I SAID _WATCHITT,_ NOT_ BOTCH IT! _WATCH IT!"

Maria was silently having a laughing fit while turned away from Old Man Watchitt. Tippi just seemed amazed.

"This missy, the heroine, wants to get across the bridge. …Yes, I told her about the grit. …Oh, well, let's just keep that between us, okay? Just let her through. All righty. Bye." Watchitt put away his phone. "Git off mah rug and meet Green on the other side of town tomorrow morning, would you? Thanks. WATCH IT! And I guess I can retire now, since my job's finally done. Look out for some ruins. Treasure's there. Nasty beasts are there too. Good luck with that and all, and, oh… this thing in my pocket… it has one last thing to say to you. " Old Man Watchitt opened his pocket and bellowed, "It says… _**WATCH IT!**_"

Maria nodded, wiping her eyes, and hurriedly left the house… at which point she collapsed into full-blown laughter.

* * *

I love Old Man Watchitt. LOL.


	7. One Part 3: The Chunkinator!

**ATTENTION ALL READERS: IMPORTANT NOTE, MUST READ! **I've decided that this story needs to be revised, so better quality and fixed plot on the last six chapters if you haven't read them already, aka MT:SPMv3 (My Turn: Super Paper Maria version 3.)

Due to my very long absence from updating because of the editing on the past chapters, I've decided to go faster with the updates and such. In case you've forgotten, in this chapter, Maria meets O'Chunks. And yes, I skipped meeting with Green.

Disclaimer: Don't own anything but Maria and her friends.

* * *

Maria breathed in and out at quick intervals, fingers trembling and eyes watering. Her nose tingled horribly as she scrunched up her face and at last gave a loud sneeze. She massaged her neck. "My throat…"

Tippi's wings flickered sympathetically from her place on Maria's shoulder, but she said nothing. The odd pair had long since ceased all conversation so Maria could keep as much moisture in her body as possible, and keep all energy focused on moving one foot in front of the other.

Why was this difficult? Well…they were walking through a desert with the hot sun beating down on them. The heat was nothing like Maria had ever experienced. There had to be as much sand out here as there were stars in the sky. An occasional cactus or rock broke the monotonous landscape, but besides that, there was nothing to look at but sand and sky. Perhaps if there were a beach somewhere near, this would be refreshing, but this was no beach, of course; this was the desert, and the only water she'd find would be at an oasis, and that was only if she happened to stumble across one.

Maria stopped in her tracks. "Water," she croaked, taking the bottle from her bag and draining it of its contents. She replaced the bottle in the rucksack and removed another bottle, swallowing half of the container in two gulps. This bottle, too, was put back in her bag. Thankfully, Maria wasn't out of water and wouldn't be out of water anytime soon. The stop at Yold Town had ensured her a good supply of water to last a few days, if she did take that long in the desert…which she sincerely hoped she wouldn't.

However, a few hours out there had taken its toll on the young heroine. Her braid was frazzled and unkempt, sweat coated her forehead, and her shoes had been filled in the empty gaps where her feet did not reside…with sand.

Tippi didn't seem to need water, but continued to sit upon Maria's shoulder and remark upon the location of the Pure Heart, telling Maria which way she sensed its faint aura coming from. They carried on like this for some time until Maria suddenly came to a stop.

"Oh, no. Great. This is just what I needed in the middle of something I already hate." Maria grimaced as she saw a large rock, and a pair of yellow Slipslides. Tippi launched herself from Maria's hat to the other side. "That's adventuring… come along, now…" She called softly from the other side.

Maria groaned and faced the journey over a vat of quicksand clinging on to nothing but a bulbous, floating plant. The halting point startled her again, though not nearly as much as the times previous due to her exhaustion.

Pressing onward, the pair faced even more heat and sand, seeming strangely endless after walking through this for the past three hours or so. Somehow, Maria reached a few palm trees smack in the middle of the desert.

"What are these doing here?" Maria wondered aloud. She wasn't expecting an answer from Tippi, and didn't receive one. Instead, she sat below its branches and took a deep breath, rubbing her eyes and finishing the rest of the water bottle she'd started a while earlier.

Not two minutes passed before she heard a voice from above.

"OI, LASSIE!"

"Wh—" Maria's reflexes, rather than her curiosity, kicked in. She rolled out of the way and scrambled to her feet, only to be stared down by a large, brutish man of some sort. Chest heaving, she gaped at him and tried to speak, though no voice would come to her.

"So yer the one messin' with the Count? A bit scrawny, aren't yeh? Tha's not good since now I'll 'afta get chunky!" The man puffed out his chest.

Maria stared, thunderstruck. "Um, well, er, sorry, but, um, _who the heck are you?_"

"I'd like to know that myself, actually…" Tippi flew forward. She quickly drew back again. "Y…You're one of Count Bleck's thugs!"

"'EY! ME NAME IS O'CHUNKS!" Maria recoiled at the loud voice of O'Chunks murdering her eardrums. "Excuse me," she said, raising a finger, "but could you maybe… keep it down? …Please?"

O'Chunks glared at her. "We're outside! Inside voices mean NOTHIN' out 'ere!"

"Right, but some of us still want to be able to hear after this," Maria explained matter-of-factly.

"After—WHAT'RE YEH SAYIN'? I ain't leavin' this place 'til I follow me Blecky-boy's orders to make yeh _feel some hammage!_"

Maria thoughtfully put a hand to her chin. "…Hammage… I could go for some ham right now…"

O'Chunks gasped. "U-Uh…wait! Make that _damage!_ Er, wait…uh…_aaah, it doesn't matter! _Yer still toast, lass!"

Maria decided to end her attempts to distract O'Chunks from pounding her into mincemeat, and instead focused on sizing him up. He was large, and powerful, yes, but he had to have some kind of weak point. As she thought carefully of her battle tactics, falling into a battle stance, Tippi perched on her hat. "Do you even know what Count Bleck is trying to do…?"

Clearly nonplussed, O'Chunks stared at Tippi. "Do I…o'_course,_ yeh silly rainbow bug! Me boy's usin' 'is powers to bring order back teh this 'ere world, and the others, too! 'is enemies are my enemies! Get ready fer the chunkin' of a lifetime… O'CHUNKS STYLE!"

Maria gasped as O'Chunks leapt far above the ground, preparing to squish her like she was a mere Squiglet. Thinking quickly, Maria scrambled up the palm tree. The abrupt unbalance of the palm's branches gave her an idea…so when O'Chunks landed, Maria used the momentum to swing herself at him and slam into his skull head-on with her fists, somehow managing, to her great amazement, to flip over and topple gently onto her knees as soon as she hit the ground. She quickly turned and sped back toward O'Chunks.

Her attack, of course, had given O'Chunks a killer headache, which was obvious from his shout of pain and clutching of his head. When Maria was close enough, he snatched up her arm and started to swing her around. Maria gasped and quickly pulled her other hand up to grasp onto his forearm, and used her Firebrand to burn him. O'Chunks gave an infuriated howl and promptly let go of Maria, launching her back at the palm tree. Maria braced herself and barely managed to catch one of the branches, hurling herself back at O'Chunks with the incredible force she'd recycled from his throw.

This time, Maria's feet whacked into his face, ending with the warrior face-up on the ground. Maria landed on his stomach, winding him, and leaned down, pummeling him with fire-punches as well as she could, hoping her bony knuckles would penetrate the strong defense of his large, beefy muscles. When O'Chunks seemed to take only some damage and started preparing to throw her off, Maria activated her Firebrand and smashed her fiery fists down on him with all the strength she had, despite her muscles screaming in protest. This was effective, judging by O'Chunks's earsplitting roars, so Maria forced herself to continue.

"OKAY! ENOUGH, LASS! THA'S ENOUGH!"

Maria jumped, accidentally winding O'Chunks again, and skipped quickly off of him. O'Chunks stood, and Maria fell back into battle position, but O'Chunks groaned and dropped to the ground, clutching his chest. "S'not right… yeh're just a li'l girl, and yeh've bested me chunks! W…Who are yeh to do that…?"

Maria frowned. "I'm the…" She thought, then smiled. "The legendary heroine of prophecy, Maria!"

O'Chunks looked relatively befuddled. "_Saria?_ But yeh aren't wearin' green… did yeh have a costume change?"

Confused, Maria scratched her head, but Tippi quickly remedied the situation. "It's not Saria… it's _Maria…_ you even got the inflection wrong on its pronunciation…"

After Tippi's correction, O'Chunks stood. He was clearly oblivious to his mistake. "Lissen 'ere, Saria!" O'Chunks boomed, making said red-clad heroine jump. "I wouldn't 'ave taken it so easy on yeh if yeh weren't such a scrawny lass! I'm callin' it a tie since that weren't fair, not a li'l bit! Now, eat yer Mushrooms an' yeh'll get strong muscles like me! And mebbe do some exercising, too—yeh need meat on yer bones! Yeh're too skinny for yer age, Saria!"

O'Chunks had ranted at her about her figure, utterly ignoring his mistake, and now saluted her and exited the dimension in a rather… interesting fashion. Maria stared, severely appalled by the encounter. "…did you understand anything he said?" Tippi asked, twitching a wing.

Maria slapped herself, regained her composure, and nodded sagely, remembering past experiences. "It was a heavy accent, but yeah, I could understand him loud and clear. I've met people. Oh, but…" Within seconds, Maria was swallowing every last drop of water from one of the bottles in her rucksack. Tippi tried to stop her, but it was hopeless, because Maria knew she would not cease her endless guzzling until she'd sucked the bottle dry. Panting, she merely stowed the bottle away and continued onward.

* * *

After a few minutes, Maria began to pass by some stone pillars. Exchanging a 'glance' of sorts with Tippi, she scanned the area excitedly, hoping she'd found the Yold Ruins…until she came to a blue pillar with a gap in it, directly in front of a pedestal of the same color. She cautiously stepped onto the pedestal and examined her surroundings. "…Is this the entrance?" Her eyes flicked back to Tippi, who was perched atop the pillar. "Look, Maria…" Tippi indicated the object below her. The pillar was roughly level with Maria's shoulders, and the square gap, about level with her midriff. Words were etched into the top.

Maria leaned forward and squinted at the message. "…'Best friend of the sun. Fed, revived; watered, sentenced to death. Friend of friend, produce your offering and enter.' It's a riddle! I've heard this one before!"

"Have you?" Tippi murmured. Maria was sure she caught a hint of disinterest, but chose to ignore it. Instead, she nodded. "Fed, revived; watered, sentenced to death… it's fire! But then it says 'friend of friend, produce your offering and enter'."

Tippi landed in the cube and flickered her wings like a small, rainbow flame. "Offering… what would we offer…?"

Gasping, Maria withdrew Tippi from the hole with one hand and put her own hand into the other. She quickly lit her hand with her power, and created a small flame, dancing merrily in its small container. At once, a great earthquake sounded… and a stone dragon's head rose out of the sand with such magnificence, such fierce welcome (was it a welcome? Maria's other hand closed around her rucksack tightly with fear) that it swept the very sands into the depths of the earth. Stairs, one by one, formed themselves leading up to the door.

With wide eyes and a pounding heart, Maria ventured slowly to the foot of the stairs with Tippi still balanced on her index. She nervously put a foot on the stairs and gazed into the opening of the ruins.

"…Is it safe?" Tippi questioned in a voice dangerously near total silence.

This near-silence, however, was nothing compared to the sheer hush that seemed to have come over the desert the instant the ruins rose from the sands. Maria glanced at her companion, completely still except for their shared quivering that still barely counted as moving at all, and took a deep breath.

"There's only one way to find out," she concluded firmly. And with that, Maria braced herself and scampered up the steps, throwing caution to the winds and making her way inside.

* * *

The name O'Chunks mistook for Maria's is a reference to the Legend of Zelda. (LOL.)

Advice on O'Chunks' accent? Simple. Think Hagrid from Harry Potter and you should have a passable idea of how to write it out.

The pedestal flame riddle, of course, was an idea from Mario and Luigi: Superstar Saga.

Yold Ruins rising from the sand had to have been like Dry Dry Ruins. Fo sho. owo

**Till next time… SEE YA!**


	8. One Part 4: A Mecha Mess

Sorry for the delay, I was in the hospital for a while D: But I'm here now! *shot* Okay, I know that doesn't make up for it. I'll try my best to get updates sooner. Plus, this is a longer update because it's a boss fight! Enjoy!

Oh well. I don't own SPM. Enjoy anyway.

* * *

It was a dark and—

Wait. Wait. Stop. I, the Great Being Who Writes the Story, know how you think this sentence will end. I can assure you heartily that this will NOT end as 'a dark and stormy night'. Just to clear that up. I mean, it's a desert. Do you expect a storm other than a sandstorm?

For your information, it was _not_ a dark and stormy night as Maria ventured deeper into the Yold Ruins. No, it was a dark and _dusty_ journey through the long, maze-like passages that had been constructed, probably for the sake of protecting the Pure Heart. Maria would have picked _boring_ to describe making her way through the ruins, but it just didn't seem to fit. Ruins just can't be considered boring unless you hate desert levels in games, even when they seem to pop up everywhere. Perhaps _tedious? _No, that didn't work either. _Hazardous _was perfect, though; Maria could think of five instances in which she'd nearly been crushed or injured, and she wasn't even through the ruins yet.

And the smell was overpowering, whatever it was. The air was so thick that she could hardly breathe. Tippi didn't seem bothered at all, and didn't agree with Maria when she asked Tippi if she thought the ruins were unbearably stuffy. Maybe it didn't affect her because she was a Pixl.

"Tippi," Maria mumbled, "are you absolutely sure you can breathe just fine?"

Tippi gave an impatient little flutter. "I'm fine… just keep going…"

Maria swallowed and shook her head. "I… I don't think I can for much longer… I need air…"

Clearly taken aback, Tippi stopped flapping her wings for a moment. She took a slight dip in height before she flitted onto Maria's shoulder. "Oh, you were talking about yourself… I'm sorry, I thought… I mean, I was so sure you were worrying about me too much…"

"What? No! I'm just a human. I can't breathe down here like you can," Maria pointed out, panting. "Do you even need to breathe?"

"Not particularly… I can if I want to…"

Scoffing in disgust at the utter advantage of Tippi's race, Maria began a long and tiring climb up a tall ladder. She hated it down in those ruins and she swore to herself that she'd never return, only to realize that when she left, she'd have to go back through. Fighting back a groan of dread, Maria finally found herself regaining energy as she spotted light much further up the ladder.

At about the halfway point, there was a ledge that Maria pushed herself onto to take a break. The unhealthy time she'd been stuck in the Yold Ruins had given her a new appreciation for oxygen, and she was sure to take great lungfuls of air as she rested. "Mrph, mpphu mpaphf phhmfemph?" Maria was too preoccupied with her Honey Shroom to think about swallowing, apparently.

"…I'm sorry?" Tippi asked politely, clearly deciding to ignore the lack of manners.

Maria realized her mistake and rubbed the back of her neck, followed by her actually swallowing her food. The large amount felt thick in her throat, and she had to wash it down with some water. "Is the Pure Heart up ahead?" she corrected herself, taking another mouthful of water.

"Oh, yes," Tippi assured Maria. "It's right up ahead-"

"_Really?_" Energy surged into Maria from head to toe, and she suddenly didn't feel like sitting on her perch for another ten minutes. "Then what are we waiting for? Let's go!" Too excited to wait for Tippi to finish her sentence, Maria seized her rucksack and began a hasty climb to the top of the ladder.

After what seemed like ages to her wound up mind, Maria made it into… more desert. Grimacing, she did a 360 scan of the area before starting to walk forward.

"_WARNING!_"

Maria gave a loud shriek as a monstrous dragon's head of faded red and white, much like the one at the front of the ruins, rose from the sands. This was followed by a long neck with a peculiar glowing pattern, the bottom half blue and the top half red. Something was odd about it, though… but Maria had only two seconds to contemplate this before the dragon roared at a deafening sound level. Maria stopped to protect her ears and dropped her rucksack as a result. After the noise had died down, Maria picked up her rucksack and put it on, shielding her eyes with one hand to look up at the dragon. Oh, that was how it looked odd: it had an antenna protruding from its head. This dragon was mechanical.

"_INTRUSION DETECTED_," it boomed. Maria winced at the dragon's loud voice. "_LEAVE IMMEDIATELY OR BE PURGED._"

"Wh…?" Maria glanced at Tippi for information, but Tippi seemed to be transfixed, focusing on the dragon. Uncertain on her next course of action, Maria stood for a few moments before the dragon spoke again. "_WAIT. SCAN INITIALIZED._"

Maria jumped as a light flashed in the great mechanical beast's eyes. "_RED CAP DETECTED. BLUE SHORTS DETECTED. BRUNETTE LOCKS DETECTED._" Its voice began to shake. "_INCREDIBLE. POSSIBLE SUBJECT IDENTIFICATION. BUT IT IS IMPOSSIBLE._"

"Possible _and _impossible?" Maria muttered, but the dragon did not pay any attention to her. It threw its voice at her once more. "_HOLD YOUR POSITION. SEARCHING DATA BANKS._"

A symbol appeared in the dragon's eyes. Maria waited nervously as Tippi remained alert to nothing but this beast before them. After a short time, the dragon jumped in surprise. "_SEARCH COMPLETE: ONE POSITIVE MATCH. SYSTEM OVERLOAD! LEGENDARY HEROINE IDENTIFIED!_"

Maria exhaled and gasped for breath in her relief that she was not going to be attacked or eaten. Tippi seemed to relax as well, regaining her spot on Maria's hat.

"_FORGIVE ME, HEROINE. I AM CALLED FRACKTAIL. MY ONLY PURPOSE IS TO DEFEND THE PURE HEART FROM LAWLESS INTRUDERS._" Fracktail's voice was less hard at this point. Maria frowned and yelled up to Fracktail. "That's very nice, and all, but could you please speak a little more softly?"

"…_OH. I APOLOGIZE. MY VOLUME SETTINGS HAVE BEEN STUCK LIKE THIS FOR SOME TIME. WOULD YOU LIKE ME TO ATTEMPT TO FIX THEM? THIS MAY TAKE…_" Fracktail paused, followed by shaking its large head. "_NO, THERE IS NO TIME. YOU ARE ALREADY VERY LATE. I HAVE WAITED THOUSANDS OF YEARS FOR YOUR ARRIVAL._"

Maria spluttered for a moment before shouting indignantly, "Yeah, well, I'm only thirteen! I didn't have thousands of years to kill!"

Again, Fracktail ignored her. "_YOU MAY PASS. THE PURE HEART IS JUST AHEAD._"

Grumbling to herself for a moment, Maria prepared to call back up to Fracktail, but froze upon hearing another voice. It was not the ear-splitting rumble of Fracktail, nor the soft, flat voice of Tippi. It wasn't even anyone she knew. All she knew at the moment was a weird, burning hatred toward the voice.

"Ah ha ha… if only it were that easy…"

Detest as she had never felt before boiled in her stomach for no reason she could explain, and it was with deep astonishment that she forced it down to stop herself from throwing something and screaming in her blind fury. She barely heard Fracktail even as it froze and thundered, "_**WHO SPEAKS?**_"

There was a ripple in the sky near Fracktail's head, and Maria caught sight of a pair of black shoes leaving the portal. These were quickly followed by a rather confused impression of yellow and violet until Maria concluded this to be a jester's outfit. Her assumption was confirmed as she saw a matching hat, but froze at this person's face. Whoever it was, they had bright, gleaming yellow eyes, a face cut in half between white and black, and a rather creepy smile. Maria felt even more loathing as she gazed up at the jester. As she struggled to control the abrupt burst of emotion, she stared with rapt attention at the jester.

"It's so very nice to meet you…" he bowed in midair. "I would call you ravishing as the rose itself, but that's just common courtesy, so you would never know if I were being truthful. Ah ha ha…"

_Whoa… this guy is arrogant! He doesn't even look the type! _Maria gritted her teeth as she thought to herself. Beside her, Tippi mumbled something, but she wasn't particularly listening, for the jester had started to speak again. "I am one of Count Bleck's minions… but I believe I'll skip the intro and cut to the chase, which I'm sure you'd appreciate, no? Unless you'd like the intro anyway?" When there was no response, the jester's smile widened. "The intro it is, then. I am the master of dimensions… the pleaser of crowds… I am… _Dimentio!_"

_Yep. Definitely arrogant. _Maria started a low growl in her throat, but stopped when Tippi spoke up. "I know you from somewhere. Who…?"

It appeared that Dimentio either didn't feel like answering Tippi or didn't hear her due to her soft voice. "It would be so very _dull_ if your adventure ended here. You agree, don't you? That's why I've decided to give you a little gift… with _magic!_"

Before Maria or Tippi could protest, Dimentio had blasted the very tip of Fracktail's antenna with some kind of colorful ball of energy from one hand. Fracktail made an odd, electric _zap_ noise, and a low groan sounded from within him.

"Ah, wonderful. Now you and this robotic guardian can have some quality time… snack time, that is! As he snacks on you! For you… are the snack! Ah ha ha!" Dimentio laughed yet again.

A bead of sweat rolled down Maria's forehead. _Okay, it's official. I know why I hate this guy now._ "What did you do?" Maria spat, eyes widening angrily.

Again with the laughing. "You've spoken at last! Even the butterfly spoke before you. As for your question, I did exactly what I said I would! Have a good time! Ciao!" And with that, the air rippled around Dimentio, and he disappeared.

"What is his _problem_—" Maria didn't have time to finish. Fracktail had made the same noise as he'd made before, only this time, it was much louder and glitchy-sounding. "_BEEEEEEEEEP. I AM ERROR. PRESS ANY KEY TO RESTART._"

"What did he…?" Tippi's voice was filled with confusion. Maria's eyes grew round, and she spoke with dismay. "Oh no… he tampered with Fracktail's… um, hard-drive? Whatever, he did something to Fracktail that's making him glitch up!" Her worst fears were confirmed when Fracktail's eyes turned a weird, dark, almost sickly blue. "Oh no! The blue screen of death!"

"…_SYSTEM NOT FOUND. INSERT INSTALL DISC. DISC NOT FOUND. PLEASE CONFIRM DISC COVER IS CLOSED. READ ERROR. INSERT BOOT DISC AND PRESS ENTER. NO RESPONSE. SYSTEM MAY BE BUSY OR MELTING INTO SLAG. APPLICATION ERROR. SAVE YOUR WORK AND QUIT. YOU LOST EVERYTHING. WAY TO GO, GENIUS. WAITING FOR PROCESSORS. "404 computer hamsters not found." THREAT LEVEL UPGRADED TO JELLY ROLL 1. DETONATION IMMINENT._" Fracktail swayed on the spot. Maria heard the clanging and screeching of internal mechanisms, and took a step back.

There was suddenly a horrible screeching noise, presumably coming from Fracktail. Maria cried out and covered her ears as Fracktail thundered random programs at the top of its voice.

"_**CTRL ALT DEL!**_" Fracktail gave a roar of pain and retreated back into the sand, immediately bursting out again. This time, he did not face Maria, but his entire body escaped the dunes and rose into the air. Maria was forced to hang on to her hat rather than cover her ears as the great snake-like dragon rushed right past her with a fierce gust of wind. "Tippi!" she screamed, as the butterfly took refuge in her rucksack. "Got any info on Fracktail?"

"For starters, it's quite enormous… and it can fly and swoop down with its big open mouth, probably eating you. I think since Dimentio hit its antenna, it'll be its weak spot at this point. You're going to need to hit it somehow!" Tippi called.

"That's a lot easier said than done!" Maria gasped, running away to avoid Fracktail's gaping jaws as it swooped at her. For a moment, it seemed to be flying away from her. Maria watched it do some magnificent loop-de-loops, until Tippi quickly warned her: "It looks like Fracktail is charging at us… watch out!"

The ground began to shake, Maria's ears began to throb, and Fracktail came charging in. Maria found no other way of standing her ground other than grabbing the nearest object, which was—Fracktail himself?

"OH, _SNAP!_"

Maria clung onto one of Fracktail's 'scales' for dear life as it rose into the air again. Almost at once, she noticed that Fracktail's antenna was in view. She frantically searched for something to throw at it for a short time, but swiftly realized she had something on hand already. Forming a fireball in her hand, she hurled it at the big transmitter with as much force as she could muster while trying to keep from falling off the dragon's back to her death. The dragon shrieked in pain as it was hit.

Seeing the effectiveness of this battle plan, Maria continued her repeated bashing of the dragon's weak point with fireballs. Her grip suddenly started to slip as Fracktail began a loop-de-loop. "Tippi, _help me!_" Maria wailed as she clawed Fracktail's back, searching for something to hold on to.

"Just relax and know when to jump!" Tippi responded.

Maria wasn't sure what to make of this advice, but she did as she was told. She slid down the dragon's back much faster than she would have liked. When she felt herself begin to slip onto the end of its tail, she took a deep breath and jumped with all of her might.

Even though she did not have much might at full power, let alone now that she was so exhausted, she found herself easily floating into the air and landing on Fracktail's head. Maria quickly grabbed hold of another scale and launched more fireballs at Fracktail. Just as she raised her hand to cast another, Fracktail actually spoke.

"_SYSTEM CRASH! AGHHHH… I HAVE MALFUNCTIONED. WHAT HAVE I DONE…?_" Its voice was filled with distress. Maria actually felt sorry for it, despite it being a machine.

"_H-HEROINE… THE ERROR IS MINE. I AM SORRY. SHAME CIRCUIT… SMOLDERING. PLEASE… YOU MUST… SAVE… OUR… WORLD…_" Fracktail's voice cracked.

With that, it exploded.

* * *

Maria next found herself lying inside of Fracktail's hollowed-out head, eyes bleary and seeming to have just awoken from unconsciousness. Tippi was sitting on Maria's stomach. If Pixls had expressions, Maria thought dully, Tippi would probably look blank other than some slight concern.

"Are you alright? You're bleeding…" Tippi's voice was even more subdued than usual.

Maria raised a hand to find the brown leather mostly ripped away from her hand, and put it to one cheek. She pulled it away to find it covered in blood. Whether it was from her hand or her cheek, she was sure she would never know.

Crawling out of Fracktail's head, Maria found that the hot desert sun was setting, a small mercy on her worn-out body. She rose to her feet shakily.

"Maria, I wouldn't…" Tippi quickly flew in front of Maria, but Maria merely limped past her—it felt as though her right ankle had been sprained—to get to the small, elevator-sized building that had clearly ascended from the sands, as she hadn't seen it before. Twisting the knob on the lone door, she ignored the bloody handprint she'd left and stepped inside. Tippi barely had the time to swoop in after her before the door shut, and the little building acted as it should: like an elevator.

The elevator had a mirror inside, and Maria stared in disbelief at herself. Her left eye was turning purple and yellow around the edges—soon it would become a nasty black eye. Her gloves had almost torn off her hands completely. Her shirt was ripped on her right side, and the portion of her stomach revealed had a long, thin cut on it that appeared to have already stopped bleeding. Her shorts were bloody (her shirt was probably bloody, too, but the red prevented it from being too visible) and her arms and legs were bruised. Her left cheek had been slashed and was still bleeding; Maria ripped off the part of her shirt that had been left hanging and held it to her cheek. It stung, but it was still an attempt to stop the blood flow. She hadn't even noticed that she was missing the sole of one shoe until she saw her reflection.

"Is adventuring always this strenuous?" Maria croaked.

"This time was just bad luck. I doubt you'll get as beat up the next time something like this happens…" Tippi was clearly trying to reassure her, but Maria wasn't comforted. When the elevator stopped moving, Maria opened the door—now she knew she was bleeding from her hand, too, from the repeated bloody prints—and hobbled down a small staircase. The small room, with a crystal chandelier and shining, untainted floors, seemed to cast shame upon Maria's ragged appearance. In fact, now that she thought about it, only her head and hat seemed to be unharmed. Maybe the hat had magical properties…?

"Welcome, heroine. I am Merlumina."

The calm, gentle voice almost seemed to soothe Maria's wounds. She watched as a beautiful woman dressed in white and blue descended from above her. Taking note of her translucent appearance, she didn't have much time to form her hypothesis in her mind before Merlumina spoke. "I am a dormant soul. I have waited long to give you the Pure Heart…for 1500 years, as a matter of fact. Here…" She waved her hands, and a cool sheet of water seemed to pass over Maria. When it subsided, she found her clothes repaired and her wounds healed. She gingerly tested her ankle and found it was repaired.

"Thank you!"

"It was no trouble. But your presence here means all worlds have begun to collapse, no…?" At Maria's somber nod, Merlumina sighed. "Before I give you this Pure Heart, I must tell you a story. Listen, please. It won't take long."

"A very long time ago, my race was one of the most powerful. Despite this, we were no match for the shadowy power of the Dark Prognosticus. Nobody knows who authored that book, but it foretold future events. On one of the last pages, it told of a chaotic event that would destroy all worlds. We knew it had to be stopped, so we planned to combat it. We set to work and created the Purity Heart. We divided it into eight and hid them in different dimensions so that one day, the heroine may seize them and save the worlds. But not everything went as planned… you see… it all started with… and then… and I said… and we… but… of course…"

Maria began to lose consciousness…

* * *

"…and that is why we hope the Purity Heart will have the power to match the darkness. To save all worlds, you must recreate it with all eight Pure Hearts. And… did you get all that, heroine?"

Maria jumped. She'd fallen asleep standing up, with Tippi snoozing on her hat. At her abrupt awakening, Tippi launched off of Maria's hat and began to flutter as if she'd been awake the entire time. Maria quickly bobbed her head.

Merlumina nodded her approval. "Excellent. I did tell you the short version, so I wasn't sure you'd understand everything. Perhaps if there is time one day I will tell you the whole story. For now, it is your duty to collect the Pure Hearts and save our worlds… we are depending on you!"

And quite suddenly, the Pure Heart was in her hands, and the warm glow had returned, and there was sweet bliss like she had experienced the first time. "I promise you, Merlumina," Maria said firmly as Merlumina faded, "I will save the worlds… no matter what it takes."

**MARIA GOT A PURE HEART!**

* * *

Please tell me you laughed at the blue screen of death. I LOLed there while writing it. Am I the only one who found that funny? XD


	9. Interlude: Princess Peach

What's this? A DOUBLE update! Well, don't expect much…

Sorry about this, but you know I have to throw in this interlude. X3 Oh well. I want to get started on 2-1 ASAP. Enjoy this very rushed interlude as much as you can.

* * *

Tallgoom peered around a corner to ensure the coast was clear. Finding no enemies in his path, he skittered across the hall and scrambled into his new hiding spot. He could only see darkness and, just outside the castle, the swirling mass of violet and black.

"And just how dark can you make a dimension, anyway?" he muttered. "The whole place is more emo than an emo convention…"

Silently snickering at his own joke, Tallgoom dashed into what he hoped was a door leading out of the castle. Instead, he came to a lonely room with a blot of pink and gold on the ground.

"Princess?"

Tallgoom's eyes widened in amazement—it _was_ the princess. It looked as though she were unconscious. Running over to her as fast as he could without tripping in his excitement at finding an ally, he hesitantly prodded her. "Princess? Princess Peach, are you alright?"

Peach's eyes suddenly opened, and she stood up and let out a yawn. Her blue eyes became round with confusion, and she merely blinked several times before frowning at Tallgoom. "How did I end up here? …wait a minute. Aren't you one of Maria's friends?"

"Yeah! I'm Tallgoom!" Tallgoom puffed up. "How _did_ you end up here, anyway?"

"I'm not really sure at all…" Peach's eyebrows furrowed in concentration. "That nasty Count Bleck tried to make me marry Bowser, I remember that… and then I think that was Luigi…or was it…?"

"You think? You mean, you don't know?" Tallgoom tilted his head.

Peach didn't respond, but called out for the two aforementioned people. "BOWSER? LUIGI? HELLO?"

All was silent. An idea suddenly struck Tallgoom—if he had fingers, he would have snapped. "I know! I'll go get Caleb, okay? He's one of Maria's friends, too, and he's the coolest guy I know! We'll definitely be able to get out if I get him!" Not thinking about the consequences of leaving the princess alone in a strange castle, Tallgoom sprinted away.

The Goomba carefully made his way back to the cardboard box fort. He tried his best to sift through the boxes to find Caleb, to no avail. "Caleb?" he whispered, as loud as he dared. "Caleb, are you there?"

Clearly, Caleb was not in the fort. Unnerved, Tallgoom slid back out the door to find the princess again.

"_Oof!_"

Tallgoom suddenly bumped into someone and fell over. "Watch it!" he barked.

"You watch it!" the other snapped back.

Almost immediately, the two recognized each other. "Alfie!" Tallgoom gasped. "You're alive!"

"_Alive?_ Of course I'm alive! Where's everyone else? Have you seen anyone?" Alfie hopped to her feet and narrowed her eyes. "Anyone will do, just tell me if you've seen anyone!"

"Man, this place is whacked out! I got here with Caleb and I haven't seen him since we built our fort! Well, that could be my fault, since I kinda left to explore after I woke up from a nap…" Tallgoom's voice trailed off sheepishly. Alfie fired up as he continued to mumble into nothingness. "_YOU WHAT?_" she screeched.

Tallgoom urgently shushed her, which she did not appreciate, but obliged to. "What were you _thinking?_" she snarled softly. "You could've been captured, or Caleb could be captured! He might even be dead! Did you even stop to think about what might've happened to your _best friend?_"

"Look, there's no time to worry about him!" Tallgoom spat. "I found Princess Peach, and I'm trying to find Caleb so we can all escape!"

"Then what are we waiting for?" Alfie's bad mood lifted, to Tallgoom's great relief, and the two armless companions hurried to find the princess. It took a surprisingly short time, but they were still a ledge away from Peach and another Koopa who seemed to be from Bowser's army. They were both looking down on a scene below, which prompted the other two to watch as well.

There was a Hammer Bro. facing two odd-eyed Koopas. "All hail the glorious count!" one shouted. "Submit to his rule. You will love it."

Shock and outrage bloomed on the face of the Hammer Bro., who was clearly also from Bowser's army. "_What?_ Listen to me—I am your CAPTAIN! Don't you recognize me at _all?_"

"Yeah, sorry," another voice said—Alfie and Tallgoom retreated further into the shadows— "but your orders mean nothing. See, they've sworn eternal allegiance to Count Bleck."

A short woman wearing bright red glasses strode forward. Tallgoom nudged Alfie. "_That's her, that's the woman hypnotizing everyone!_" he hissed. Alfie stepped further back into the camouflaging darkness as the scene developed. "Anyway, it's your turn, K? So I'll just pencil you in for a last minute brainwashing," the woman said coolly.

The Hammer Bro. growled and held up a hammer to smack the woman in the face with it. "Oh, no, you don't! Look, lady, I serve Bowser! You can tell this 'count'—" He was cut off by the woman lowering her glasses. Alfie and Tallgoom both shielded their eyes by turning away as the Hammer Bro. let out a cry of pain. There was silence, and then a booming shout: "HAIL BLECK!"

Alfie gasped in horror as the Hammer Bro. saluted the woman, who nodded. "Yeah, see, isn't that better? So, I've got a job for you. There are still some other minions who won't swear allegiance, so be a lamb and just round them up for me, K?"

The Hammer Bro. saluted again. "YES, MISS NASTASIA!" he shouted. He and the other two hypnotized Koopas marched away into the shadows, the woman called Nastasia carelessly following at her own, leisurely pace.

There was a horrified silence for a short time. It was broken only by the quivering voice of the Koopa. "O-Oh… oh, man… Did you see that? They even broke the captain! W-We've gotta get out of here, or it's game over for us!"

"I'll say," Tallgoom called. Peach gasped and whirled around, relaxing when she saw Tallgoom and Alfie. "Oh! Tallgoom! You startled me! I'd thought they'd found us…!"

"No, no! I couldn't find Caleb, but this is—"

"Alfie," Peach interrupted. "We know each other."

"It's not just because I'm Maria's friend, either," Alfie explained. "We worked together in a cake-baking contest two years ago."

"We won," Peach said proudly.

"Look, that's awesome, but this is no time to play catch-up," Tallgoom growled. "We have to get out of here."

"You're just going to leave Caleb here?" Alfie asked indignantly.

Tallgoom's eyes darkened. "If Caleb were here," he said coldly, "he would tell us that the princess comes first, and that we need to get out of here as soon as we can. I don't want to leave him here, but we have to!"

_Is that really what he'd say? …His stupid crush on Tatum might interfere with his better reasoning. Would he even want to leave, or would he stay and look for her…?_

Shaking himself, Tallgoom beckoned to Peach and the other Koopa to join them on the ledge. Taking the Koopa by the claw, Peach floated to the other side using her parasol as the pair watched, amazed. "That's quite the umbrella," Alfie commented.

Peach shrugged and led the group as they traveled through the dark castle. Somehow, Alfie and Tallgoom found themselves separated from the other two… and back at the cardboard boxes.

Tallgoom kicked a box in frustration. "How the heck did we lose them?"

"I don't know." Alfie sighed. "I hope they're okay…"

Unknown to them, at that very moment, the newly brainwashed Koopa had joined the march, and Peach had been rescued…

* * *

Sorry this was so terrible, and sorry to everyone that likes the part with finding Peach after she fell from the sky and stuff, but I really, really don't want to include it because I'll probably do a horribly bad job. Seriously, this part is boring me to death. I'll write it in some other time and let you know when I do, but for now, I'm skipping right to 2-1. See you there.


End file.
